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Gone with the Wind (Chernobyl/Private)

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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Fri May 13, 2011 9:22 pm

They'd finally found a job for her: permenant laundry duty. Not that she was complaining; at least she didn't feel like a freeloader anymore.

Occasionally, it did make her sad that a former physicist had been brought down to manual labor, but without the ability to write or read, her math prowess was all but useless now. And this world of economic hardship was not kind to intellectuals, anyways.

It was morning, and she was sitting next to a bucket as she waited for it to fill with water. This was the biggest problem of the job: she needed a full tub to wash clothes, but she wasn't strong enough to carry it from the nearby faucet to the area with the clotheslines. So before she could even start, she had to fill it one bucket at a time--and even those buckets were still not very light. Plus, she had to dump out the dirty water and refill it periodically. This was the only difficult part, though; after that, it was just scrubbing, rinsing, and hanging. (Folding wasn't something she did, though. They found how how messy she was about it.) Not exactly quantum physics, and it was something a blind person could easily do.

The first few days, she'd been terribly worn out--it was, after all, a lot of clothes. And not only that, but blankets, sheets, pillowcases, and whatnot, as well. Cosim had helped her a lot (especially with the water), but as she grew accustomed to it, she insisted on doing it herself. No matter how long it took. That was part of the deal, after all. And there was something self-satsfying about doing things on her own, for once.

When she'd determined by feel that the water level was high enough, she turned off the faucet and hefted the bucket back to the area where she did the washing. She was getting better at navigating the carnival grounds in general, though she still preferred not to wander alone.

Locating the washbin with her foot, she poured the water in with a splash and a satisfying lifting of the weight on her arms.

Okay, that was done--but before she could start, she had to take down the clothes she hung up earlier. Unfortunately, the moment she unhooked the first shirt, a gust of wind rolled through like a train, snatching the article of clothing right out of her hands.

Crying out in alarm, she tried to reach out for it, but it slipped just beyond her reach. Mortified, she searched in the general direction the wind had been blowing in, but it was no use--she had no clue where it could have gone.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Fri May 13, 2011 9:52 pm

She didn't want any help. She didn't need any help. To him the latter was completely subjective. It was alright to watch her, at least, since she couldnt see him. Right? He was paranoid that the second he wasn't looking she would get hurt. At the same time, he knew the importance of her being independent.

But... She just looked so helpless. For a while it was cute to watch her shuffle around. He wasn't the type to let someone he cared about struggle with anything. Sometimes she dropped clothespins, other times she accidentally got soap on her face (it was still there) and never noticed. He just needed an opening to help her.

Thank god for the wind. Immediately jumping from the crate he was sitting on, he caught the article of clothing easy in the air. He tried not to make it seem like he was watching as he placed the article in her hands with a laugh. "Trying to get my attention, Sonya?"
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Fri May 13, 2011 10:38 pm

And then when she was despairing over what to do, the shirt miraculously appeared back in her hands.

"Cosim?" Of course it was Cosim, she'd recognize his voice anywhere--but she hadn't been expecting it here and now, at this suspiciously convenient moment. Hadn't she told him that she didn't want help? Or had he really just happened to be there, as he'd made it sound? But it really did seem too convenient...

And yet, it would have been terrible for her if he hadn't been there. Her mind was not sure how it wanted to feel about this.

Well, she would just have to prove that she could do these things on her own. Giving him a quick hug, she said, "Thank you--I don't know what I would have done without you..." Pecking his jaw, she turned pointedly to go back to work, taking not-so-subtly purposeful strides back to the washbin--

Which she fell right over into by accident.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Fri May 13, 2011 10:53 pm

She probably suspected he'd been there the whole time. Still, he didn't help her till she needed it. Wasn't that the sign of a caring man? Even though his heart was telling him to almost smother her with protection-- you could never be too careful-- he resisted.

As he watched her pivot and march back, he realized-- she really did know. He was about to apologize, when--

OH GOD SHE COULD DROWN. SHE WOULD DROWN.

Cosim leapt over as fast as he could to pull her out of the water (which didn't look like the best to be in at any rate). After pulling her wet hair from her face, he took her over to the crate he had just been acting as her sentinel with and made sure she was alright. "Did you swallow water? Do you need to vomit? Is it in your eyes? Can you breathe?" Alot to ask of a woman who had tripped into a bucket of cleaning water for only a few seconds.
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sat May 14, 2011 12:26 am

The tumble had come as such a shock that she hadn't even had time to cry over it before he whisked her to 'safety' (it wasn't exactly deep enough to drown in, considering it didn't even go up to her knees). At any rate, his distress was more distressing than the fall itself.

Coughing slightly--for she had swallowed a little bit of water--she insisted, "I--I'm okay...! My eyes are fine, see?" (A bit of an ironic statement, but whatever.) "I'm okay, really..." 

And though she'd repeated it for emphasis, she couldn't help but rub her elbow where she'd fallen on it awkwardly. There would probably be a bruise there soon--she seemed to bruise easily. She never realized it, because she couldn't see, but they were much nastier than she knew, often turning an awfully deep purple before yellowing. All she knew was that they hurt. But all bruises did, right?
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sat May 14, 2011 8:05 am

It took a while for him to believe her, but finally he released his grip on her face and his worried expression dimmed a small amount. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright," He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and dried off her face and hair as best he could. The water was the farthest thing from clean.

Then he caught sight of her rubbing her elbow. He immediately jumped into action; First by looking at it, next my making sure it bent alright. It was fine, as far as he could tell (He'd soon see.). But, just in case, he didn't want her out there working again until an appropriate amount of time had passed. "Why don't you take a break, Sonya? I'll do the rest of this." There wasn't much left, but he was still afraid to let her do any of it.
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sat May 14, 2011 8:43 pm

Whimpering slightly in pain when her elbow was bent, she pulled back a little, automatically. Maybe it was worse than she--no, no, she just hadn't been expecting it, that's why she flinched back. It really wasn't that bad...right?

Either way, she looked crestfallen when he said he'd do the rest of the work. "No, I can work!" She insisted, though it sounded like she was trying to convince herself as much as anyone, "Really..."

Getting up, she went back (more carefully, this time), and felt around for the clothesline, "I just have to change into something dry...then I'll be okay..." Her dress usually got a bit wet when she was washing, anyways, but not as much as it was now. It felt gross against her skin, so maybe a fresh dress was all she needed to feel better. Unfortunately, it was hard to tell which dress on the line was actually hers--usually, someone else sorted through the clothes. Not wanting to seem like she couldn't even do this on her own, she pulled one down that seemed like the right one.

...It was a man's t-shirt.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sat May 14, 2011 9:24 pm

She was hurt. He was speechless for a moment while the alarm registered in his head. Unfortunately, in that moment, she had already gotten up. "But--" Too late. He didn't want to impede on her self-sufficiency. He wished he could tell her she didn't have to prove anything to him. That he did things for her only because he wanted to, not because he had to. That he did them out of love. But he wasn't sure he was ready to tell her that yet.

And just this once, he wouldn't tell her her mistakes. Perhaps she would never notice. The shirt looked big enough, anyway. He swallowed his worry and careful tone. "You know, I'm starting to think all that blindness is just an act." His voice carried a smile, but his expression couldn't even meet it halfway. "You just want the attention."
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sat May 14, 2011 10:40 pm

She had to smile, a little, at that, "I'm a good actress, aren't I?"

Reaching behind her, she felt that there were, as she thought, sheets hung up on the line of clothes parallel to the one she'd gotten the 'dress' off of. Perfect, it would act as a makeshift changing screen. Cosim was there, but...he wouldn't mind, right?

Lifting the water-weighted skirt over her head, she pulled it over and slipped her arms out of the sleeves, discarding it in the grass next to her. What a relief--there was no worse feeling than wet fabric clinging to one's body. After a moment of letting her skin air-dry a little, she pulled on the new 'dress'...

Her features immediately became perplexed. It didn't feel right at all. It was one thing if she hadn't picked her dress, but this didn't feel like a dress at all. Turning towards the direction Cosim was in, she asked, "Does this look right?" Maybe she'd put it on backwards, or something--
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sat May 14, 2011 10:53 pm

Even though they were, essentially, together, he couldn't help but try his best to turn away from her as she changed. White sheets werent completely opaque. Her silhouette alone forced red to his cheeks. So maybe he looked. Just a little.

He had already implied the shirt was her dress before-- no turning back now. Although he was seriously starting to worry about her reaction when she did find out her folly. He just had to make sure that never happened. "It...It looks fine to me," His voice came out wavering and nervous. She could hardly do anything on her own that wasnt practiced. "Maybe it's one you haven't worn in a while, that's why it looks different. Trust me, I remember them all." Well, at least the last bit was the truth. He felt conflicted. He promised himself he would never lie to her. But what if the truth would possily damage her more?
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sat May 14, 2011 11:31 pm

Well, if he was so certain, then she would just have to take his word for it. But why did his voice sound like that? Stepping out from behind the sheet, she found and held his hand, looking worried, "What's wrong, Cosim?"

Had she somehow hurt his feelings by making it sound like she didn't want his help? It wasn't that she didn't want or enjoy having him around to assist her--on the contrary, she loved it. But she felt like it was such a burden to him. Before her, he surely must have had so much more time for himself. She was taking up so much of his time and energy, with her disability. So she had to show that she could overcome it, even just a little.

"You know I'm so grateful for everything you do for me...right?" She asked softly, moving her arms so that they were encircled around his middle.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sun May 15, 2011 12:03 am

If he knew what she was thinking, he would have stopped her quicker than she could have started. On the contrary, next to heavy lifting in front of an audience and heavy lifting during set up and take down, all he did before caring for her was sleep (which he needed to repair his muscles, but he'd had way too much time for it. If the shadows under his eyes were any indication, he didnt enjoy sleep as much as he should have. So he always had time for her. In the morning, getting her breakfast; in the daytime, helping her with situations like this; and at night when Güzäl alerted him that she had a nightmare and he moved himself to the usual truckbed to hold her so she'd fall asleep (granted, she'd done the same thing for him on occasions). And he was happy to do it all again the next day.

"You know I'm so grateful for everything you do for me...right?"

Wrapping his arms around her, he kissed her shoulder and thought. he wanted to say, 'You know I'd make the earth spin the other way to make you happy... Right?' Instead he only nodded into her hair with a quiet but affirmative "Whatever makes you happy." Not as smooth as the words in his head. "You don't have to prove anything to me."

And, he supposed it was a bad time to mention it, but people began to stare. "Sonya... That's not a dress. That's one of Arash's shirts."
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sun May 15, 2011 10:54 am

If only he knew how catastrophic spinning the earth in the opposite direction would be--

Pulling his face from her shoulder, she held it in her hands and met his lips with hers so that they could kiss properly. Maybe if she'd known there were people around, she would have been more reserved, but...in all fairness, she couldn't see them. She didn't even know how to respond to him. He said she didn't have to prove anything, did that mean he didn't consider it a burden? In that case, what words could possibly be said?

...And then she was told that she was wearing Arash's shirt. Not that she had a problem with Arash, but she didn't want to wear his clothes. Immediately, she pulled it off, stood there, holding it half-naked and looking confused. Where was her dress, then??
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sun May 15, 2011 12:57 pm

She was all he ever focused on, so if people were looking, he hadn't noticed, either. "When I do things for you it's because I want to," He finally told her.
"Not because I don't think you can. And don't think anyone here thinks any less of you because of what you can't do." He was sure she was smarter than everyone there put together. With a small laugh and a small kiss, he ended the speech with, "And if anyone does, I'll beat the shit out of 'em." He was half joking.

It wasn't like he didn't expect a blind woman to make such a mistake, but he was most surprised to see her just toss it off like that. "What are you doing--!" He rushed her to the wall of sheets and wrapped her in one, going to look for her dress.

Once it was found, he went back to her, holding the sheet around her so she could change. He indicated the front and the back of it for her so she could get it on quicker. "I know you can't see them but trust me, they can see you."
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sun May 15, 2011 9:03 pm

Blushing, she hid her face in his shirt, embracing him tightly. He had no idea. No earthly idea of how much she'd fallen for him. Every time he spoke so reassuringly to her, she just fell even more desperately in love--how many miles had she fallen down the rabbit hole by then? It seemed to stretch on forever.

She did pull away when he suggested beating someone up for her, though, "No, don't do that...!" Her face was still pink, yet also innocently distressed. She took him so seriously, sometimes.

And then it seemed like it was his turn to be distressed--though she didn't know why. "'They'? Who? Is someone else here?" It was hard for her to understand what viewpoints others may have, how far they could see, what they could see--the image she had in her head of the carnival was by obstacles. Pieces of a topographical map that didn't fit together so well, but functioned okay on their own.

Nevertheless, she put on the dress, and a new thought struck her. "Cosim, what color is this?" She indicated the fabric, "Does it look nice...to you? Do you like it?" She didn't think about what she looked like much anymore, because she couldn't see herself...but Cosim could see her. Shouldn't she look nice, for him?
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sun May 15, 2011 9:44 pm

Very little amused the man when he was sober, as in, the only thing that could was that very little woman. Maybe it was that wide stare that absorbed everything for how it sounded. He'd seen her deconstruct complicated statistics in her head but at the hook of a good joke her brow would crease and those big eyes would disappear in a blink and then return even wider with a confused 'Why?'

"Relax, relax..." He assured, pulling her close to him again with a laugh. "I won't ever do that." As far as she would know. He could treat her as gently as a Faberge egg but to others, it was a toss up which side of him they would see every day. It wasn't something he could control unless she was there as a pacifier. She did have a talent, after all.

Well, perhaps more than one. If obliviousness could be called a talent. She excelled so much at it, it deserved the title. "I don't know if you realize..." He adjusted the dress on her shoulders. "...That this is completely open air, and this is right by the men's caravan..." Although those in the caravan knew they'd be sleeping on the train tracks with a rope blanket by morning if they were watching.

What color? He almost groaned inwardly. Did that mean that if she didn't like it she would throw that off with abandon to get another? And--

...Did he like it? If his own ensemble was any indication, he really didn't look at clothes. He knew that clothes showed sometimes who was on top and who had to be trampled under their feet. He and clothes were not on good terms. But he supposed he could indulge her. She did look nice, after all.

"You want me to stop looking at you and tell you what i think about some fabric?" He asked, mock hurt lacing his tone. But nevertheless, he soldiered on. "It's blue... like the sky and like your eyes," they were one and the same, to him. "And i like it, i like it alot. But i like you much, much, more."

He couldn't help but still worry over her elbow. but he supposed there was really nothing he could do about it. Looking over to the cause of the injury, he saw a few more articles that hadn't gone through the wash. "Do you want to finish the laundry or have some truck bed time with me?" It had become a routine, their talks, among other things, in that truck in the middle of that field where they had first really become close. Looking back, he was glad he was kicked out of the caravan for snoring that day.
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Sun May 15, 2011 10:45 pm

(("Train tracks with a rope blanket"... /SHOT /could not resist XD))

Her mental map was obviously off a little. ...A little. Eyes growing even wider, her head cocked to the side just slightly in bewilderment, "I thought this was far away from any cars...?" It seemed far away to her, to one who took small, slow steps everywhere without the help of a guide. She had no clue it was but a very short distance from the caravan.

She was obviously relieved when he said he liked it, though. Shoulders relaxing, she exhaled and smiled at him, cheeks tinged with pink. "I'm glad...I was thinking I want to look nice--as nice as I can...for you." Towards the end, her voice grew quieter as her blush deepened. Burned as she was, she knew she would never look perfect for him; 'as nice as she could' was the best she could do. Obviously, he wasn't hung up on looks, since he was interested in her to begin with. But still...it was hard for her, as a girl.

Nevertheless, he certainly knew how to make her happy. She had all the time in the world (well, really, all the time in that day) to do the laundry, so she saw no problem with taking a break. "Let's go to the truck," she replied almost immediately, already holding his hand in eager anticipation.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Sun May 15, 2011 11:34 pm

((XD I knew that would come up lmao XDD))

"Nothing is far away from anything in a carnival." He told her, as if it was some big life lesson. Or perhaps he just took wide steps. "Remember that." Maybe that's why she tended to run into things when she thought confidently that they werent there.

Lately she'd been blushing more than usual, and saying things like that, things he wasn't sure what to say to. He mirrored her nervousness and quietness, mumbling as she took his hand, "I don't know, I think you're beautiful... All the time..."

He was glad he didn't have to dwell on her and what he thought about her looks any more (she was blind, but what if someone else saw how red his face was? Credibility lost.) now that he had a direction to go to and the job to lead her there. He meticulously made sure, on their way, that he wasn't walking too fast, and he was holding her hand tight enough that she wouldn't slip away and get lost. Unnecessary worries, really, but they did pass the time quick; he was there already.

He dug some keys out of his pocket and unlocked the tailgate, lifting her up so she could sit on it. This was the only place suitably far enough away from the bustle of the carnival. As a light sleeper, he measures distance away by how long it took him to fall asleep against the noise. Too long, and he moved the truck farther. It was in the perfect place, finally (though he would have to do the same procedure at the next town). Best of all, he remembered as he nearly just flopped over into the truck bed, the sun heated up the metal, so it was automatically warm. For him, the most comfortable place in the carnival was the hardest surface to sleep on (for other people, anyways). But as long as he had the quiet, the sun, and Sonya, he was happy there.
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Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr Mon May 16, 2011 12:33 am

Unlike him, their going to the truck gave her plenty of time to dwell, as she had little to do but follow alongside him. (It was always nice when he was there to help her around; she didn't have to focus so much just ro get from point A to point B.) 

If he was blushing, then she must have had steam coming from her ears. How had she managed to attract the attention of someone so wonderful? She couldn't even count all the ways she was lucky to have him--and it just kept multiplying every day. Like just now: he thought she was always beautiful. Her. The former freak.

When they got to the truck, and he lifted her inside, she immediately pulled out the folded blanket she kept in a compartment inside the bed. The hard surface may have been fine for him, but it was hard for her to be comfortable on.

Spreading out the blanket, she lied down and pulled up closer to him, kissing the side of his face. She felt far more at ease here than in her own bed; the truck bed was even bigger than it, but with Cosim there, she didn't feel so alone in the dark emptiness that sometimes threatened to swallow her entirely. He was the anchor in her world.
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Post  DIDNEY WORL Mon May 16, 2011 12:34 pm

For someone who couldn't see, she was smart enough to be self-sufficient, he mused as she pulled out a blanket as if she'd already made the truck her place, too. It was still new to him, this being with someone else. Before he had no one else to turn to (nor did he think he wanted anyone else) if there was something on his mind. And then when he did have someone to turn to the only thing on his mind was her. It didn't seem rational that things could go that way.

When she kissed his cheek, he took it as a cue to turn so he could fully kiss her. If only for that he had nothing else to say and wasn't thinking about anything but that. He put one arm around her waist and slid her closer. "So what else did you do without me, today?" He knew. He was there. But she didn't know that. "I wanna hear all about it."
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