I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

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I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

Post  DIDNEY WORL on Sun Aug 07, 2011 6:57 pm

THIS IS FOR YOU, OPPY-- I hope you enjoy it; it's hard to convey that much awkwardness and mouth-breathing that is Arash in one little thing-- /shot XD

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Human Resources Department
Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries
Helferstorferstraße 17, 1010 Wien, Austria
International Atomic Energy Agency
Wagramer Straße 5, 1220 Wien, Austria

To Whom it May Concern:

This letter has two purposes: to formally submit a complaint, and to put the facts of the situation on record. The subject of my complaint is the treatment I have received by my co-worker Frl. Administrative Manager Franziska Schuetzeneur.

Please note that I have been an employee at OPEC and IAEA since 1960. I have every reason to believe that I am a dedicated and outstanding employee. I am confident that I exhibit the highest work ethics and treat my supervisors and co-workers with respect.

My complaint, in brief, is that Frl. Administrative Manager Schuetzeneur has been harassing me and other employees on several occasions. The latest event has been extremely shocking. As a result, I have made the decision, despite great difficulty, to make a formal complaint. This previous year, I had the humble honor of being elected as president of OPEC, and thus was expected to work closely with the Administrative Manager (who also was managing IAEA, although it's hard to notice people in those meetings while constantly under verbal attack. A letter over these events is forthcoming). I had asked around, and the person in question seemed like a reasonable woman, albeit under much stress. I explained that I would hope to alleviate it as much as possible-- I planned on exceeding expectations. I'm a very hard worker, also honest, no matter what people may say. Unfortunately because I am honest I cannot withhold these seeming acts of aggression, borderline hate crimes and sexual harassment, from this organization.

The events were these:

--On my first day working, she arrived at four in the a.m., and was apparently waiting in a dark office building for me to get there. She is very small but she would have been able to reach the light switch fine. When I asked her why she was so early, she asked me why I was so late and was it because I was too early out of my mother's womb to have a brain. I should not have to explain how uncomfortable such talk about a maternal figure is.
--She is intelligent but sometimes ignorant. Assuming it was supposed to be a congenial gesture, she bought lunch for the office. It was wiener-schnitzel-- which all of us thought was veal. As it happens, now it's most commonly made of pork. Half of the members are practitioners of Islam—including myself. When we spit it out she told us to refund her what she'd paid for us. It seemed like it could have been avoided.
--According to the previous incident, I had thought she just didn't know some basic tenants of a major religion. Yet as I drove her by a mosque (only one of three mosques in the country) she made some caustic remark about it-- I don't wish to recount it.
--Another lunch incident took place soon after, when she invited me out to have lunch with her and what I would assume was her Russian friend. He barely blinked and the discomfort I felt hearing them insult each other was beyond measure. She ordered me something with pork again (I can't read German) and when she asked why I wasn't eating, I explained and then to make conversation, asked why she wasn't eating. There was one glass of water at her place setting that she hadn't touched. After I made the innocuous remark she made me pull out her chair so she could stand and throw the water in my face before throwing the glass at my feet and leaving me with her strange friend.

I would have spoken to my supervisor but unfortunately the Frl. Administrative Manager is my supervisor. So I sent out the list above on a memo. I took it down after hearing her crying in her office, but was later informed by a contemporary that it is a regular occurrence. I had to only hope that she read and understood my grievances.

--However, again on another day, we were late for an IAEA meeting-- I drive her to and from-- and for some reason she is adverse to wearing the same thing to both. She is also adverse to lateness. To save time, she ordered I help her put on hose while she attended to the upper half of herself. I refused and left immediately. When we finally arrived at the meeting, she blamed her lateness on me, and since the committee at IAEA is quite quick to blame me (again, letter forthcoming) my small good reputation there was shattered. The next time we were late I did help her with her stockings. I felt like I had sinned in the greatest way possible and though sin has no fault but the sinner... I must take a stand and blame her. I got emotional from guilt afterwards, and she proceeded to call me names. She routinely speaks to my mother-- they are friends through this job-- and made the mistake or deliberate insult of telling her all of this.

I am sure that company policy must prohibit or discourage this kind of behavior. In fairness, I should point out that Frl. Administrative Manager might not have intended her first occasion of this behavior toward me. However, despite my clearly negative reaction, and the reprimand from my supervisor, she continues to harass me.

I want to reiterate that I am a loyal employee, and work hard to get the job done in a professional manner. I do not need the added pressure of discourteous treatment. I trust you will agree, and I look forward to your assurance that it will not occur again. I would also appreciate an apology or other recognition of the error, directly from Frl. Administrative Manager Schuetzeneur. I feel this is an entirely fair request.

Please let me know how you will resolve this.

Sincerely,


Arash Amirpour

cc. Human Resources

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Re: I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

Post  MOSSAD TRAINED SHARK on Sun Aug 07, 2011 9:21 pm

LMAOOOO This made me smile/giggle so much. Godddd, I really do love portraying their office life together, they have the best business marriage in the world. B)

This is so cute/funny, fff Thank you so much. <3333 I also, can't really describe here how happy this makes me. I love the format of this, and it is really so perfect fff. It's such an honour to get these kinds of gifts for my birthday, so again, thank you so much. <3333
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Re: I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

Post  Blank on Sun Aug 07, 2011 10:47 pm

fsdjfkdsafkf This is brilliant. xDDD I snorted too much at the lunch thing because I can picture Arash pulling her chair out just to get splashed in the face and so on perfectly fsdfjk
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Re: I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

Post  DIDNEY WORL on Sun Aug 07, 2011 11:01 pm

FFFF thanks guys c': I can't take all the credit-- I used an HR complaint template and just tore it all apart-- XD I never understood why an organization with so many Muslim nations in it would be headquartered in a country known for it's intolerance for Islam-- oh well, good comedy comes out of it-- /shot XD

Lmao I wish I added more to the clothing part-- she wears the hose that clips to the underwear-- /shot XD but my favorite part was just having to write her title over and over again. It makes it genuinely Viennese-- XD THE "HERR DOKTOR PROFESSOR" RULE. B)

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Re: I'll call this a birthday gift but you have no Idea how long I've wanted to write this--

Post  nahn-SEK-wuh-tuhr on Mon Aug 08, 2011 2:39 am

LMAO I can only imagine what that outing was like for Arash. It probably deserves an entire vignette, in itself. :I

"Oh dear, Frachenka, what is this. It can't possibly be the menu--is this what passes as food, here? Well, I suppose it's good I'm not picky... And really, must you bring a date? I know you are desperate, but I'm inclined to think that you can survive for one outing without dragging along any willing homeless man you can find. Yes, it's nice to meet you, sir. No need to shake hands, I just washed mine."

WORST LUNCH EVER.
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